Sunday, February 8, 2009



HOH’s have a very complex and many times difficult undertaking in trying to transform their woman’s character. The “formal thank you” is both an instinctive and intuitive act of submission, gratitude and reconnection. Many women instinctively drop to their knees and orally thank their HOH as a sign of their appreciation for all that he does for them. Just as many men instinctively know which and when discipline is needed for their women, many women know how to instinctively thank their HOH. Whether the HOH gains sexual enjoyment or whether it is clouded by the emotional energies surrounding the punishment is irrelevant. What is of significance is for the woman to pay attention to the causes of her punishment and not obtain any pleasure from the “formal thank you” herself. Sometimes women struggle with being punished because they feel they are being punished to often. Even if it is to help her actually feel and be more submissive to her HOH. Sometimes a woman needs to be punished more often than she feels necessary. But how often and when is not her choice, when she agreed to be submissive and obedient to her HOH she has given up that choice. This should help her sustain her submissiveness for longer periods of time. The "formal thank you" without a doubt assists a woman with her submission. It helps to establish powerful bonds between the HOH and her, her submission and his authority over her. After a punishment the woman should feel loved by her HOH. The "formal thank you" cements this love and strengthens both the role of the HOH and his woman. In DD it should not be allowed for a woman to derive enjoyment or any sexual satisfaction from her discipline. Discipline should be a punishment to teach the woman a lesson and change her behavior. However, every HOH knows what is best for his woman. The important thing to think about is that while we are all in different situations and that there are no rules or correct way of doing things, it is essential to follow the training from our HOH. After all, it is his authority to which we must abide. These blogs have tried to outline a few points which shed light on the “formal thank you”. It is not necessarily overtly sexual for either party. It has also summarized some of the many loving rewards for both the HOH and his woman. I personally love the closure and feelings that performing a “formal than you” on my husband (HOH) gives me. I do not have an orgasm or get “turned on” by it yet I can and will orgasm from a playful sensual spanking. It is not giving him a “blow job”, that is a sex act almost always followed by intercourse and orgasm. I am giving him the respect and love he deserves for having to punish me. I know it sounds weird to say that being on my knees in front of my husband with a red butt makes me feel more loved than almost any other time. I also feel closer to him. As he holds my head and wipes my tears it makes me feel ashamed that I in essence forced him to spank me. If I did or didn’t do what we discussed then he would not have had to spank me. But I know no matter what he loves me and would do anything that is required of him to keep me safe and on track. Thank you for reading my blogs and I welcome your comments and suggestions. Smooches.


  1. Hi,

    I wanted to email you, but didn't see an email address listed, so PLEASE forgive me for posting this to comments. Didn't know how else to reach you and didn't want to pass you by, either.

    I wanted to let you know that Variant Books is publishing the first-ever Disciplined Feminist spanking/DD book, called "How to Get the Spanking You Want: The Complete Guide to Asking for It, Getting It and Making It Better."

    So that as many women (and men!) have access to this information as possible, I'm reaching to others in the community for help in spreading the information about this new resource. Would you be interested in sharing this resource with your readers?

    You can get more info at

    Sincerest apologies again for posting this to comments -- No offense intended!


  2. Dear slave_puppyface,

    Can you recommend any quality videos that portray a healthy DD lifestyle (male=HOH, female=sub). All that I've found are akin to watching violent boxing match...not a mutually loving relationship. Any suggestions would be kindly appreciated.